Why we created our own friendship holiday
The origins of Midway Present Day and how to co-create a holiday of your own
A few years into our friendship, Erin and I were bemoaning the post-holiday blues that arrive in the first cold, dark months of the year. Even though my birthday falls in January, it can only do so much to dispel the gloom.
Although we were recent college graduates on tight budgets, we both felt drawn to the idea of exchanging little treats — bright glimmers of joy amidst the grey. So, our very own holiday, January Present Day, was born. The rules were simple: Send each other a single, small gift that made you think of the other person. We’d pick out a loose leaf tea or a pair of whimsical cat socks or a silvery eyeliner and pop it in the mail sometime in January (often with a fridge-worthy postcard). It could even be something we got for free (at the time, Erin worked for a startup in New York City and would occasionally get cool swag as a perk1).
The reason this tradition thrived instead of fizzled was largely due to its flexibility. There was never any formal date selected — we each got to choose our own timing, more or less. The budget was never specified, although there was a general implication that it should not be expensive. Free, thrifted, homemade, or store bought — as long as it made us smile and think of the other person, it was a-okay for January Present Day.
Our little holiday continues to be extremely flexible. As the years rolled on, our Decembers got busier, I added a wedding anniversary to my January festivities, and gradually, Erin and I realized that January wasn’t the right timing for our holiday anymore. It was feeling more like a burden than a boost. So, why couldn’t it shift to a later time? A time when we otherwise wouldn’t have a reason to treat our bestie? We landed on the middle of the summer — far away from other major gifting holidays and birthdays, when we are feeling a bit more flush with energy and cash — and renamed it Midway Present Day.
Whenever it happens, this mini holiday has never ceased to brighten my year. It feels different than just buying each other treats randomly — by setting the intention and building a container, we’ve generated more excitement and joy around it. We get to savor the anticipation for weeks, unsure of exactly when the gift will arrive but knowing it is coming Soon™️2, and enjoy the thrilling hunt for our own treats to send. We get to shop without the trappings and stress of traditional holidays. And, we get to revel in knowing that, by building traditions together, we’re building a life together. I’m looking forward to celebrating Midway Present Day (or whatever it evolves into next) with Erin for many years to come.
Your Forevers focus: Celebrate a made-up holiday together
You can create your own holiday, or hop on the Midway Present Day train! Here are the basics to DIY-ing a custom friendship holiday:
Pick a time: Sit down with your friend and brainstorm a season or month when you could use a little friendship love boost. Maybe you choose a season that is particularly challenging when you know a little jolt of joy could be valuable, or maybe you go for a time of year that feels important to your friendship when you want to add a little intentional celebration. We suggest building in wiggle room rather than choosing one specific day, so that you can enjoy the element of surprise. And don’t forget, if the timing isn’t working, change it!
Give your holiday a name: You can get really silly and creative with this, or just adopt our naming convention of “X” Present Day.
Go forth and celebrate: Plan how you’re going to commemorate this holiday! Maybe it’s gifts like us — remember, they don’t have to be costly (you could borrow some of our treats you can send with just a stamp or check out my creative guide to thoughtful gifts). You could also forego gifting altogether and opt to make a fancy meal or do something else small but special. Work together to come up with a celebration that feels fun and not like just another burden in your already busy lives.
Erin note: I have also been known to scour a stoop for gifts, which may be the origins of my Present Day gift this year. 👀
Erin note: Yes, this is a memeified version of one of my baby pics. You are welcome.